Wednesday Wisdom How to Watch all the Football
It appeared to me this week that there is a football game on every night! We had Monday Night Football, Champions League last night and ahead we have more Champions League tonight, Europa League Thursday, Friday Night Football, and then the usual weekend installments.
Now, for any football-loving male such as myself (which I suspect is a lot of you) this is cause for great celebration; what more could you want than the beautiful game on our television screens every day? Nothing that good in life can be simple though, and there is one problem. The other-half.
Unless you're one of the lucky ones who has a Mrs who doesn't mind watching the football, or are a bachelor, you will face the obstacle of a less than football friendly ball and chain. With that in mind, we have come up with some ways in which you can negotiate that obstacle and still get to watch the footy!
Head to the pub
First things first then; you need to remove that ball and chain for the evening. Suggest to the Mrs that she should head out and see her friends for dinner or something, that way you seem like you're being a considerate boyfriend and you're free to head to the pub!
Whilst not all public houses have a licence to show live football, you should be able to find one near enough to you where you can watch the game. Watching the match at the pub allows you to escape the wrath of the Mrs for a few hours in a beer-flowing safe haven.
The pub can often provide the next-best atmosphere to actually being at the game. A lot of pubs nowadays understand the profitable opportunity football brings to them now, so you will often get pubs doing drinks and food offers; as well as projector screens to bring the game to life.
This is a great way to enjoy a few beers and the footy, whilst engaging in some good old fashioned male chat for the evening.
Head to your mates
If the Mrs doesn't fancy going out, then make another generous offer; suggest that she has friends round at yours. You will look accommodating by offering to vacate for the evening, which gives you the opportunity to head to one of your mates' house.
This lad is likely to be single, therefore can invite round whoever he likes for a football match. It offers a much cheaper alternative than going to the pub, as you can share a crate of beers with the lads at supermarket prices.
If your host is a proper lad, he will provide the crisps and dips; and extra points if he's got a couple of pizzas to chuck in at half-time. The beauty of being at your mate's house compared to the pub is that you can shout at whatever you like without the risk of offending anyone.
That goes for your attire as well; if you're supporting the team in the minority, you can whip out the 98/99 replica shirt!
Compromise
If neither of the above are plausible options for you, then you're going to have to negotiate further with the Mrs. Firstly, good luck! So what can you do to convince her that you should be allowed to have control of the TV from 7.30-10?
This is where you're going to have to offer to do something for her in return. That could be entertaining the in-laws at the weekend, doing the food shopping, buying her a new handbag, the list goes on.
As lads, we tend to only think about the present, so we will agree to any of those compromises if it means we can watch a glorious Champions League night. Hold on to that thought for when you have to splash out 100 quid for that new handbag.
Last resort
Nothing else has worked; your other-half won't give in to your football needs. In this situation, there is only one lonely option remaining. Grab your laptop, take yourself into the bedroom and watch the football.
Okay, it's not ideal having to lie in bed with the laptop resting on your stomach, but at least you get to watch the football without any nagging!